- Can you take people out and touch them up? (from Paul Cooper).
- Pointing to the 20×16 in the price list for 500 Euro, customer asks “how much is it for one? I don’t need 20!”
- In the middle of a family session, the Dad steps forward and hands me his own digital camera, “take one with this I’d like to email it to all our relations”.
- Customer: How much is it?
Photog: The sitting fee is 65 Euro.
Customer: Would it be any cheaper if we stand? (from Richie Gavin).
- I’d like a disc of high resolution proofs so I can zoom in on the faces, I promise I wont print them myself!
- Customer: I’ve come to collect my wedding album from 15 years ago.
Photog: Do you mind me asking why you left it so long?
Customer: Do you have any idea what it’s like to find parking around here? (from Fran Gavin).
- I presume you will throw in a set of high-resolution files so I can make my own album & give out copies to my friends; I’m a bit of a dab hand at Photoshop myself you know! (from Michael McKay).
- I know you, you did my sister! (a girl who bumped into a wedding photographer in a pub).
- Customer looking at the previews, “My ears are far too big” (from Andrea Siffert).
- Customer looking at previews, what’s that mark on my face? Photographer stares back at the woman’s face and says retouching is free but plastic surgery is extra!
- After shooting a family reunion of 13 children with their Mum & Dad, one son, a Builder, asks how much for 14 (10×8)s?
Photog: I’ll do them for 50 Euro each.
Builder: Ah come on, I don’t want them framed!
Photog: Actually they are just in card mounts.
Builder: Wow, you’re a bigger robbin bastard than I am!
- Customer: Can you make me look slim? Photog:- Sorry Misses. I’m a photographer but my cousin is a panel beater down the lane! (from Brendan Grace).
- Photographing a group of 18 children in the studio, among the chaos one of the fathers comes into the studio sits beside me and starts taking photographs, I say to him “no cameras please”. He retorts angrily…….”why not, they are my children”? (from Joe Gavin).
- Customer collecting his passport photos “Can you also put that onto a disc”.
Photog: “Yes that will be an extra 50 Euro”.
Customer: hands over a memory stick saying “I don’t have 50 Euro so just put in on this instead”.
Photog: “Okay, that will be €49.50”.